Banned Friendship

My Mama used to tell me not to let friends get too close. 

Don't let them in....figuratively. 

My first father in law used to tell me friends from the threshold out. 

Don't let them in...literally. 

 I lived by these rules

but it tends to get a bit lonely

And if I was meant to live alone I figured God would have put me on a remote planet

instead of on a fully occupied world

What I found was a whole lot of people I had no interest in knowing

Then found people who were quite interesting but much too dramatic

Too much shallowness and noise clogging up the true self

 

Each time I would retreat back to the rules

But feel that something was missing

Then I found those with similar interests and ways

And threw the rules out the window going to the opposite extreme

I opened myself completely

Something akin to standing naked in front of the classroom

What I discovered was the danger in doing so

Of getting caught up in subtle drama that was not my own

Of how it poisons an exposed heart

And I remembered the rules

I no longer follow any rules

I have learned that I require a balance

between the two extremes I was privileged to experience

I need friendships, but only at arm's length
That I do not have to close myself off completely
Nor let anyone in more than necessary

That there is a time to weed out those who no longer serve a mutual purpose 

And a time to get to know someone a bit better

That my journey is mine alone

And that people will come and go

That we will touch and be touched as we learn the lessons along the way

And enrich each others lives before moving on to share the riches