Geek Squad for Brains

My Mama went home last week

The doctor asked why she would return to an empty home if I could care for her full time

My Mama responded "because she does everything for me and I'm becoming weak"

And she's right

In life, unless challenged, we run the risk of becoming 'mush'

There's no reason to grow or become stronger

We don't know what we're capable of

~

She left my house barely able to walk up two garage steps

We stood at the bottom of 17 stairs in front of her home 

and she climbed them without a problem

Her ankle is crooked, she has a torn rotator cuff, the c-diff is clearing

and to see her you wouldn't know it

112 lbs of determination

~

With a heavy heart I left her at her home

but it was totally worth seeing the reunion

between Mama and my furry sis (the dog)

And since my son is still with his dad

I figured this new found freedom would be glorious

Instead it's as if now that the adrenalin is gone

I've been plowed over by a train

I've only managed to take my Mama to doctor visits

and do 'post infection' cleanup at home

My brain feels disoriented

Hubby looks at me with eyebrow raised everytime I ask

What month is this? What day? What date? 

~

 Angrily, I lay with arm dangling off the couch yesterday

Staring at, but not watching, the tv

Thinking but not thinking

Can a brain be tired? Is that even possible?

Perhaps like a computer

the brain needs to be defragmented

Wondering if this is what my brain looks like right now

~

I'll bounce back

I always do

But for now, I go back to the elevator music playing in my brain