Fragile Creativity

In the Artists Way tribe, we've been talking about those ruthless little censors

Who typically work their evil in silence
and try to convince us just how much we suck

Shedding light on them will help us see them for what they really are

I decided to name mine The Itch - ok sure it started out as a derogatory term

But soon I realized she's like a bad itch deep under a leg cast

Or under the arch of your booted foot while on the bike doing 80 on the highway

Annoying, teeth grinding....but once addressed provides the utmost relief

As in how sweet it is when I ignore The Itch's whining and win. I like winning.

But lately I've discovered a more sinister censor lurking in the shadows

Could The Itch have an evil twin? Or did I become so used to The Itch's voice

that I didn't hear the other?

Like a teeny little seedling rising from the ground after a forest fire

My creative mind has started whispering little ideas

So faint that I had to keep shushing The Itch because I wasn't quite sure if I'd heard something

And as I tried to coax her to speak louder, another voice piped up 

and spoke about dust bunnies, and weeds the size of cows, and leaning tower paper piles

She reminded me where the vacuum cleaner was and as I ignored her

And walked towards the studio, she planted images in my head of hubby working hard

The guilt intensified and The Itch and The Intruder high-fived

I finally made it to the studio yesterday morning

Armed with knowledge that it was a Saturday and hubby wasn't working

I figured the creative little seedling would flourish

Instead, being under the bright lights of attention, it withered and died

Or got sucked back into the ground of grey brain matter

The Itch and The Intruder rolled in laughter

As I sat there motionless like a puppet without a puppeteer

Nothing...I tried....nothing....wanted to scream....nothing

Frustrated I instead stared out at the beautiful storm

and did nothing (nada, zilch,)

the dust bunnies rolled like tumbleweeds in the vast expanse of a thoughtless brain

I'm not too worried, yet

In doing the Artists Way I'm launching a secret attack

that will annihilate The Intruder and stomp The Itch into submission

because I don't necessarily want to get rid of The Itch

I think under good supervision, never turning my back on her, she can be an asset

Like a good support stick for the fragile seedlings of creativity

~ ~ ~

One of my tribes(wo)men shared this article today

It speaks of the things we do to ignore our creative callings

like tv, drama (like the above), fear/anger, social networking, lack of sleep

I think I was guilty of all

but added one more 'Extreme Guilt', which is The Intruders specialty

or perhaps The Itch is more cunning than I thought

and has developed multiple personalities - gulp

~
LOL you do realize drama like the above
would have got me committed not too many years ago