As I sit here listening to the clock s-l-o-w-l-y ticking the minutes by, it occurs to me that I have been presented this same lesson over and over again. And I have not learned it yet; Patience. I hate waiting. I hate not being in control of a situation. Which leads me into the other; Trust.
Tick-tock I went for my tests yesterday and now I'm waiting for the results. The mammo went ok but the ultrasound was a bit painful as they poked around the lump a bit. My gut says it's a cyst but... Patience/Trust are telling me to be still.
Tick-tock My sister spent the night yesterday and today. We spent the entire day roaming around the shops and it's nearly impossible to think around her. She's a ball of positive energy and all I do is laugh around her.
Tick-tock I ran into a watercolor artist at a fair today and enjoyed speaking with her about her art. I love talking to those that are self-taught.
Tick-tock My appointment is Tues pm. Since son is in school I actually reached out to my ex-hubby for help. Me. Whoa...I don't even recognize me anymore.
Tick-tock How do you speed up the clock? I feel like I'm standing on a small piece of ice drifting in the middle of the ocean and it's melting fast.
Tick-tock I've 'seen' ideas in my mind for a book about the true face of healthcare in America. My poor mind is losing touch with reality.
Tick-tock I'm angry that I'm letting this consume my mind. After all that wasted time with illnesses I said I'd never do it again. And here I am. At lesson's door....
....AGAIN. Tick-tick-tick-tick
Hi Elena, thanks for letting us know what is happening with you. glad your sister makes you laugh...Did you tell her about me? Is she coming after me? Ha ha...you hang in there
ReplyDeleteI'm still keeping that prayer going for you
Where ever you are right now this very minute is where you are to be... Lessons waiting time family laughter and touch paths with you past relationships...
ReplyDeleteBe still and know that I'm am there....This statement has come to me many time in my own path... trust in it and it will get you through.
Peace
~v~Laura
More strength and prayers for you Elena! Keep laughing, it heals.
ReplyDeleteYes, sometimes the quiet times are when the demons come out. But seems you have much external support to sustain you during this limbo.
ReplyDeleteI am always able to see in your writings the glimmers of humor coming out even in the most challenging times. And am amazed at how profound and meaningful your words are. Keep writing, let the feelings fly into the air and disappear. And keep visualizing pure health and white light within. Give the monkey mind (and clock) a rest. Peace!
I know the feeling of waiting for the results of tests. Just remember "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayers and petitions, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Phillipians 4:6
ReplyDeleteLaura also hit the nail on the head with her quote of "be still and know that I am there".