New Moon

Blimey! Do you ever make those spur-of-the-moment promises to self that end up biting you in the ass? I do it all the time. "God if you let me pass the mid-term, I'll take flowers to church" or "If you help me find my keys I promise not to each chocolate all week". Yep, stupid promises. Like God really cares how many Hersheys I eat. But I did it again and tried to be sneaky about it.

When I first saw the job posting I thought PERFECT. When little common sense questions came up I told myself to be quiet. When the questions persisted I said "Ok, Angels, I promise if I don't get an offer I will not pursue any jobs until my son is out of school. I will take it as a sign that I am meant to focus more fully on becoming an artist." That kept my head quiet. By Wednesday my head whispered, "ummm, remember that promise..." "Shhh" I said "I promise if I haven't heard anything by Friday, back into the studio I go." And they sent little messengers in the form of emails or visitors who have said I should start thinking about selling my drawings. And when I respond that I'm not good enough I get hostile responses. And when I dare to dream that perhaps one day I'll be good enough to sell something I muddle the thinking with the what, when, where, why, hows. And I hear "keep your promise and trust". Ugghh, they used my own promise against me! Is that even allowed?

And throughout the day yesterday and today, way back in the dark corners of my mind, I thought about creating. So it was with a sigh of relief that I have reached my self-imposed deadline. Because now I have to keep my promise of course. And I can allow myself back into the studio. I do these strange things to myself all the time. I need to justify. I can't just have fun without a reason. Who cares...it works for me.

And then I found out there's a new moon Friday night, January 15.

It's a great time to set intentions for the things you'd like to attract or manifest in your life. Where you commit to your vision and are open to the guidance, healing, and support from Spirit. In the days before the new moon, pay attention to the longings that keep popping up. These are like messages from the soul.

And I read an article, New Moon Rituals by Molly Hall in About.com, where she says that the "new moon has a more inward feel, has a void or empty quality, and therefore can be frightening to those not comfortable with uncertainty. Can you learn to trust the dark? It's the moment when the old passes away and the new is not yet here. That's why it's a powerful time for sending out your prayer, wishes, desires to the Universe." Oh. Does that describe my current path or what? And it even included my word for the year - trust.

So I won't pretend to know anything about the power of the moon or if it's a load of mumbo jumbo. All I know is that there is something magical about moonlight. Perhaps the combined energies of everyone looking up at that same moon. All sorts of people separated by a neighbor's fence or miles and miles looking at the same moon and opening their hearts to nature, to Spirit. And perhaps all that energy forms connections that magnify into positive vibrations. Drawing in the assistance we need to manifest our intentions. Like a spider's web. One strand isn't as strong as the interconnections made by many individual strands. And together capturing what's needed to nourish the host.

Hmm, could be.

Stranger things have happened.