WARNING: The following is a bunch of whining. Feel free to skip to last sentence!
I've come to the conclusion that I am lazy. Don't get me wrong, the last few days I've moved furniture (twice), planted gardens, weeded, painted, cleaned, and still had a feeling that I should be doing more. That I wasn't giving 100%. And I consoled myself that with all that movement and sweat that I must have lost atleast 2 lbs. But no. I gained 5! And my only clue was that my fingers, legs and ankles felt swollen and painful. And I justified it by saying I had just worked them so much they were shocked and playing dead.
But when I looked in the mirror this morning I realized my face was swollen too. My eyes looked beady. Typically I would find the beady eyes amusing but I looked at my fingers and legs again and they look like little sausages. That's when I decided to try the scale. And arggghhhh.....I looked back quickly just to make sure Jazz (my dog) hadn't snuck a paw onto the scale. What the hell happened? I was working hard and only had time for a meal or two a day. Then I remembered that hubby started buying regular pop again and that's my weakness. Coke, Sprite, Squirt....I don't discriminate, I love them all.
And that's why I've decided I'm lazy. I find the path of least resistance and take it. If I can just grab whatever is available, why cook something healthy. I tell myself I'm too busy doing other things. And I console myself by saying I'm too old to lose weight anyway so why bother. Exercise? Why? Surely hauling pavers and trees around the yard should count for something, right?
Wrong. They are all excuses. Because I'm too lazy to exercise regularly. But for a moment this morning I was ashamed. That I've let my laziness do this to me. It's hot and I won't wear shorts because of my legs. I'm trying to hide my bubble butt and found myself wearing clothes that I'd normally never be seen in public with. (I swear it was my night shirt).
And for a split second I remembered when I was 16 sitting at the lakefront with my two girlfriends. They were complaining about how the guys they were dating were treating them. I told them they should just walk away. Didn't they see they were being used and they should respect themselves enough to demand that these guys do the same. They both told me I didn't understand because I was skinny (yeah I used to weigh 118). What? They explained that because I was skinny I could have anyone I wanted and since they were heavy they had to make do with what they got. I told them that was a bunch of crap, weight had nothing to do with settling for losers. I said they had chosen to behave as victims instead of using common sense.
And here I am today choosing to behave as a victim of my own laziness. I've got the exercise equipment and the time. But I get bored easily.
So is anyone interested in losing weight with me?
Monday, May 24, 2010
9 comments:
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Um... yup! I'll be the first to sign up. Have an August deadline to get in good shape. Two big events then. My problem? Tomorrow. I say I'll start tomorrow. Tomorrow never comes!!! There's always another tomorrow! I get busy with today and figure it'll have to start tomorrow. Keep chasing it but haven't caught up yet. Better start today, no?
ReplyDeleteif i answered that last question, you'd slap me, so i'm not touching it with a 10 foot pole....or a 12 foot one for that matter :)
ReplyDeletebut seriously, food makes all the difference, since it sounds like you are totally moving and being busy....
whole food.....real food....you can do it....i know you can ! i gave you a jump start, right ?
so fruit....lots of fruit and veggies....you can do it !!! YES you can ! BUT only if you really want to :)
i've been walking/slow jogging 2 miles every morning and it's killing me....but i want to do it.....my butt is happy when i do it....so i do it !! and music makes all the difference for me....so when you are cooking all that healthy food you're going to buy....play that funky music and you'll be amazed at the difference in you attitude !!
xo
Hi Elena. I recently started working out again and was buddied up with another blogging friend. It does help! She had to drop out for the time being because she got sick but I am struggling to keep going. I'll join you! It helps. We made a pact to start easy with 15 minutes a day, 3 days a week. That is pretty easy, right? I'm doing stretching and lifting weights. I live on a sort of farm so I do a lot of exercise anyway, hauling hay and firewood and buckets of water but a regular exercise routine is still helpful. It makes you feel good about yourself and keeps your body ready for those days you have to move furniture, weed, paint, clean, etc. Start by figuring out what exercise you want to do and then start doing it the next day. I do it Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteHi Elena!! I can totally relate to the whole weight issue---been battling it forever. But what you're describing sounds to me like it might be water retention. It doesn't sound like anything you did should have caused you to gain 5 pounds!! And when your fingers feel like sausages I'm thinking it's because they're swollen. I remember you mentioning something about high blood pressure awhile ago. Are you on meds for it? I've been on meds for it for about a year now and it's a combo high bp/water pill. Maybe you need to cut down on salt---isn't there a lot of sodium in regular pop??? Anyway, it's just something to think about. Really seems like with all you did and how little you ate you should NOT have gained weight! But I'm no doctor!!! The whole weight issue is a very soooooore subject for me. For the last 3 yrs. I am constantly trying and constantly getting nowhere!! GRRR!!!
ReplyDeleteWhat Robin said made a lot of sense. Another thing to remember is when you are working out or hauling pavers and trees around the yard you are turning fat into muscle. Muscle weighs more than fat. So sometimes when you do start working out regularly you actually weigh more but are smaller in size. I wouldn't mind joining you in a little exercise support program in blog land as I need help too.
ReplyDeleteYep I am! I need a support partner too!! I get lazy myself. You would think I would be a rake with 6 kids to chase after. I can relate to all you've written there. I'm willing to work with someone else to get fit and motivated again.
ReplyDeleteOMG Elena.....I do the same things. I ate most of a batch of cookies yesterday because I did not have *time* to cook. then I had a headache and stomach ache. AN ADULT---DOING THIS!!!
ReplyDeleteI need/must lose some weight for my knees and I have not had to lose weight in so long, I don't know how. Truly.
And I have a home gym and detest regular exercise because it keeps me out of the studio.....good lord....I need an intervention.
So how are we going to do this?
And I don't even have a scale that works, but I have a closet full of clothes that don't fit.
They work just as well.....
XXOO!!
Anne
I agree with Robin. It does sound like water retention. You should go see a doctor because there can be any number of things causing this.
ReplyDeleteYes, water retention. I do believe there's a lot of sodium in pop. My diet plan usually works, but I went off yesterday... cookies, candy and top it off with salt and vinegar chips from the health food isle. HUH? People don't realize how much more muscle weighs. Nobody would guess my weight accurately. I have a layer of fat over some bulking muscle. And I quickly let go of my current yoga routine when the yard work is so demanding. I especially like to warm up early in the morning. Boosts the whole days metabolism and mood. I still have weight to lose. I remember how much easier everything is when you don't carry extra weight. Some believe you store memories in every cell of your body and shedding weight can brings emotions you've been stuffing away.
ReplyDelete