My Guide

 On May 1st when I was 4 yrs old

I lost my big brother

Up until a few years ago I missed him horribly

I don't anymore

Because I've finally come to understand

That he never left my side

In times of great distress

I can call him

And feel him near

Literally will feel tingling on my hand

As if he's holding it tight

And when I'm on the bike

I sometimes will feel a pressure at my back

As if someone is holding on

And I tell him to hold tight unless he wants

his lil sis to lose him in a ditch

Some can argue that it's all in my head

But I know in my heart

And when my cousin said he used to tell her

That he would always take care of me

And I told her he still is

She said she had no doubt

And the only proof I have

Is what's in my heart

And the fact that he saved my life

Because I wanted to die

And was contemplating how

When I suddenly became pregnant

And the doctors said impossible

What does my brother have to do with it?

My son looks just like him

And I know it's to remind me 

That my brother will always be with me

Until I die

Me & my brother                          My son