Where oh where can it be?

For a few weeks I've been driving around the little building. Slowed down a few times and talked myself out of it and sped off. Today I finally parked and quickly walked up the steps before I could change my mind. I figured the door would be locked but no, it wasn't.

It's a small little church where the 25 people inside made it look half full. Mass was just about to start. I was hopeful. I've been craving this for a while now. It was the shortest mass I've ever been to, perhaps to get the farmers back home? But I left with a heavy heart. Questions unanswered. It was the same as the last time I left. I suppose it'll be the same if I revisit in 20 years.

I called my mom and told her it didn't work. I didn't find what I was looking for. She said I had to listen; that there are lessons to be learned in these discussions of past events. I told her I could recite these events by heart. The answer is not in the historical. I told her perhaps another religion. She said it didn't matter; all praying to the same God. I agreed and she said she could never figure out what I wanted. I said me either.

No wonder I didn't find the answer in the little building.

You can't find IT if you don't know what IT is.

So I went and bought the little boy a few little things to put into a stocking and a few little toys. Thinking of his opening these made me feel better. I felt something in my heart. It was a little bit of what I was looking for....

I think.